Grandma L was visiting from California for the week. Songbird was telling Grandma about an imaginary trip she took to Mexico…
“So did you bring any gifts back from Mexico?”
“Sure did.”
“What’d you bring for Daddy?”
“A hat.”
“What’d you bring for Bug?”
“Another hat.”
“Did you buy yourself anything?”
“Yes, a very pretty Mexico ballerina tutu.”
“And what did you bring for Grandma?”
“Pills.”

“Mom, can you please pray that I stop farting? I’ve been farting all day and I need God to stop it.”

Driving by a cemetery…
“That’s a place where they put dead people, right?”
“Yup. When you die you don’t need your old body anymore because you get a new body in Heaven.”
“When I go to Heaven I’m going to have a RAINBOW body.”  (stated as fact)

Singing Beyonce’s “Single Ladies”…
“All my sing mah lettuce, all my sing mah lettuce”

After reading Songbird her bedtime story (The Secret Garden), she turns and asks Handsome, “What’s a mansion?”
“It’s a really big house… this one had 100 rooms, remember? Were you listening to the story?”
“No.”
“Why am I reading to you then?”
“I have no idea.”